It’s well worth investing in a variety of sex toys if you haven’t already, as they are super for playing with on your own or with our partner(s). Ranging from pocket vibrators, to strap-ons, to anal toys – there is a toy and a budget that will suit you. There are sex games as well, such as foreplay dice, sex position playing cards and edible underwear which can all bring a new level of excitement and can all spice things up in the bedroom, or the kitchen, garden, forest – wherever takes your fancy.
Strap yourself in for the ride…
Bondage has had increased interest over recent years (thanks to 50 Shades) and covers a range of pleasurable accessories and activities from tie-and-tease play with fluffy handcuffs and a side of spanking, to building your own dungeon. There’s some basic brain chemistry involved, as we’re all hard-wired with basic pain and reward principles, and also your brain releases the same chemical endorphin during pain and when having sex. Always make sure the levels you want to go to are agreed in advance and having a safe word is advisable, as events can be drawn back from going too far without killing the moment.
Lube really cannot be recommended enough and it’s hard to imagine a sexual experience that can’t be improved with a bit of added lubrication. Use it when you’re on your own to get things moving, in foreplay and with toys and during the actual act. A long sensual session, where you can really loose yourself is so much easier to achieve when there is no friction or chaffing. If you are using condoms then using lube will help to stop the condom breaking, but make sure your lube is water based. There are loads of lubes, including stimulation gels as well as flavored, scented and tingly lube so dive on in and test out which you like best.
Take away the worry
Knowing you are keeping yourself protected from unwanted pregnancies and STI’s can be one of the easiest ways to get your brain to relax and stop you stressing and worrying. Condoms are the obvious choice, and you can use them for oral, vaginal and anal sex, and there are also dental dams for female oral sex. Some people think that condoms can rather ‘kill the moment’ but they can become a pretty sexy part of foreplay (especially if your partner puts it on with a handful of lube. Condoms come in a wide variety of flavours, textures, colours and thicknesses so see which ones you prefer for various scenarios. Don’t forget the water-based lube and please don’t forget to only use each condom once!
Don’t forget to take control of you
Everyone has the right to experience the type of sex they want to. Although easier said than done, aways try and make the right decisions for you and if you are feeling pressured take some time out and clear your head. If you do get caught up in a moment that the following morning you wished you hadn’t, then don’t dwell on the negative emotions such as guilt or shame and beat yourself up –put it down to experience and take control.
Regular STI testing should be part of everyone’s wellbeing if you are sexually active, especially if you have more than one partner, as it stops the chance of STI’s getting out of hand and also means you are far less likely to pass them on to others. Choose the testing method that is right for you and your lifestyle, whether that is visiting a sexual health clinic, paying for a private lab test or testing yourself at home. Those of you who know us know how passionate we are about giving you the tools to take control of you, so please #GetPleasure, #TakeControlOfYou and #KnowYourStatus
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